The start of SBT GRVL is a festival of pain. I saw people dump their entire matchbook on the first riser out of town. Wheels crossed and bodies flipped on the first uphills. People ripped hero lines through the single track and took out three people to gain one second. Floyd Landis, on his tandem, …
When I bridged to the break, I instantly entered the rotation and passed a small man clad in a Zia kit that rippled with energy. After a brief pull, I returned down the conga line, and the man turned to me and cried out, “MATTTI!” Holy buckets! It was Fortunato! Fortunato is a living legend. …
“My god mate, how many meals are you eating?” the Kiwi said. We’re at the Walnut cafe in Boulder doing our best to show visitors a good time, proving we’re not basic suburbanites who have forgotten how to have fun since we started changing diapers as a full-time job. We hiked Sanitas, which was enough …
The tow truck roared up at 45 mph and screeched to a halt right in front of my Subaru. A large man leaped out of the cab dressed in a bright construction vest and galloped up to us with a labored stride. “HOW YOU BOYZ DOING!? the man boomed. He took one look at the …
I Didn’t Screw Up Unbound 200 and You Don’t have To Either Read More »
“How can we help you?’“I booked a hotel room for the night.”“First and last name?”“Matti Rowe. That’s R-O-W-E! Could also be under Gravel God or Diesel Daddy.”“Nothing in our system for you…today. It looks like you booked the room yesterday.”“You’re joking.”“No.”“FML. Ummm…You don’t have any vacancy tonight, do you?”“I do, but you won’t like the …
Red Granite Grinder 2022 “OK, what’s our strategy?” Forest said. “Here’s what I’m thinking. I’m going to go freaking bananas on Rib and try to annihilate the entire field and get a gap. This sort of worked last year, except I got caught. Your job is to ensure you get in the chase group, so when I …
After looking at Ned for one second, I knew he would smoke me. His hair was mostly gray, nearly white, and he had the face of someone approaching their 70s, but his frame was that of gnarled oak, hard, trim, his calves ripping with the torment of fifty years of pedaling.
“So, what are your goals for SBT GRVL?” my wife asks. “Well, I’d love to make it ten minutes into the race without a catastrophic failure that leaves me immediately 10 minutes behind the leaders.” The first four miles into Unbound 200, my saddle bag ripped free and fell into my rear rotor. During BWR …
“Matttttti?” My mom called. “Something just happened to your bike? Come up here and take a look.” I was half-naked in the basement bedroom, ready to fall asleep. The Red Granite Grinder was starting in eight hours, and I had to get up in six. I came upstairs. “I’m not sure what happened,” My mother …
I Didn’t Screw Up Red Granite Grinder and Neither Do You Read More »
I took a wrong turn, not that it mattered. Until my technical ability rises above a garbage truck, I will never do well in gravel races. You can’t make it up, no matter how strong you are. I know this, and I yell. Going through the turns, when my speed approaches blinding stupidity into a …
I’ve spent years failing badly at bikes so you don’t have to. I have a mortgage, two kids, a wife, a dog that doesn’t listen, a weakness for Miller Lite, and fish frys – but I can still turn a pedal if I have to. Chances are we’ll get along just fine.
C’mon now – let’s get fast together!
Insights, stories, and guaranteed laughs delivered to your inbox.
2023 Gravel God Cycling – Privacy Policy – Disclaimer
